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A Pledge to My Readers

This satirical essay was recently published in The Morning News, and it begins like this:

I’ve always written high-quality sentences, prepared with the finest grammatical ingredients. In the coming year, I’m raising the bar even higher: I’ll be offering only artisanal words, locally grown, hand-picked, minimally processed, organically prepared, and sustainably packaged.

The piece has an interesting origin. After reading some foodie news about artisanal this or that, I posted a Facebook status update announcing that I was only going to be writing artisanal words. A lot of friends responded to the note, and as I plotted new comments to add to the thread, I realized there was something there. As crowdsourced ventures go, it was small — but fast and delightful, which I really liked. When the essay came out, I posted it on Facebook again, where people spread it around. Ten years ago things you wrote would disappear into some chasm.

Now you can see them wend their way around the web, climb the media food chain, get into people’s heads. I like this new environment a lot.